I apologize in advance… I did NOT play the first Hitman. Maybe that makes this whole post worthless… but I don’t care. I DID play the 2nd through the 5th!

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My rating for 2002’s Hitman 2: Silent Assassin for PS2 is…

★★★½

This game is my personal favorite of the four I played. It features some fantastic iconic locations, and creative objectives and/or storylines. The ways to complete the hits can be far ranging and interesting, but sometimes the player can feel caged in by them. There are only a few specific ways to complete each one, and that lack of freedom doesn’t mesh well with the game’s idea. But like I said, the locations, like Thailand, Japan, the desert, the skyscraper, and Russia, are all awesome. I also thought the addition of 47’s clone made this game something really special.

My rating for 2004’s Hitman: Contracts for PS2 is…

★★★

This is basically Silent Assassin: version 1.1. Just a few updates here and there, and a new story, nothing much different. But I will give it praise for a few moments of unexpected freakiness, like the ghost I saw that one time in the sprawling hotel map – scared me to death! And that intro mission is quite unsettling – 47 walking over the bodies of his clones….

My rating for 2006’s Hitman: Blood Money for PC is…

★★★★

This, I believe is the quintessential Hitman experience. There is less emphasis on designing level-specific ways to kill that the player must jump through hoops for, and a more simplistic emphasis on 47’s consistent and reliable skills like fiber wire, and throwing knives. The levels are all brilliant and sprawling. The winery is brilliant, the theater is brilliant, the rehab clinic is brilliant, the hotel is brilliant, the heaven and hell party is brilliant, the tropic suburbs is the most brilliant of all of them – single handedly offering the most basic and enjoyable hit mission of all time – just a sandbox for 47’s limitless carnage. I had a lot of fun with this game, and I believe there needn’t be any Hitman game better than this.

My rating for 2012’s Hitman: Absolution for PS3 is…

★★

This whole experience just felt contrived to me – like J.J. Abrams’ new Star Trek movies are to a fan of the original 70s Star Trek show. It was just Hitman kitsch, and I hated it. I did like the “point-shooting” aspect though.